Surviving the Solo Road Trip with Wee Ones

Summer 2012 was a summer of travel.  Used to be, when we needed to travel more than 300 miles, we'd hop on a plane (see my traveling with toddlers tips--we flew a lot).  Now with 5 potential tickets to buy and Dave Ramsey on our tail, the cost and hassle of driving seems far easier a burden to bear.  So, when we had a wedding to attend in Cleveland, a move to Louisiana the week after, a trip to Tucson and then a beach trip to the Outer Banks, we gassed up the car.
It seems that people's expectations when road tripping are set by their parents during childhood.  To my Army-Ranger dad, stopping to sleep drew out the torture.  When we drove, it was straight through. NC to AZ? It's just 34 hrs.  He employed the slap-your-cheeks method of wakefulness.  We moved every 1-2 years and always went to Tucson for Christmas.  Many of my good family memories took place in the car.

The Louisiana to AZ trip was important to me, and, since it was last minute and out-of-budget, it needed to be straight through, with all three kids, and solo.  I know. Unthinkable.

Until you think about it.

According to Google Maps, Monroe to Tucson is a 20 hr trip:  Monroe to Dallas, Dallas to Midland, Midland to El Paso, El Paso to Tucson: 5 hrs each trip. 5x4 is 20 hrs.  I can't drive 20 hrs to anywhere, but I can drive 5 hrs at a stretch with my crew. No problemo.  So.  How do you work the car logistics?  Here are some tips:

1. Keep your expectations in the car consistent.  TV in the car is bad.  I heard that gasp.  I know it seems convenient-nay-neccessary when you have a whiny toddler back there, but push on through.   When I was that kid in the back seat (before personal viewing devices), I read or looked out the window during our marathon road trips.  You know what I learned?  Constellation formations.  What our country looks like and how quickly the geography changes from state to state.  The workings of the inner-ear (don't read too long--or else). How big is the sky. Trucker communication is a language of lights.  That there are parent-approved games which promote punching your little brother. Navigation and map reading. Texas really is its own country. Car seat with intact seat-belt contortionism. This time in the car is an opportunity, not something to be suffered. My kids have never had TV in the car.  We bring books, yes, and have games and books on tape, but most of their time is spent looking out the window.  And they're (mostly) content. All. Trip. Long.  
2. ipod bud in one ear, with peppy music and podcasts loaded.  I've been scolded by lots of people for this, but as long as you check each state's law (most are okay with one bud in), keep the volume low enough to hear kid emergencies and high enough to ignore annoying repetitive chatter, it's really no different than talking on the phone.
3. Kids get drinks 100 miles or one hour before next stop.  That way, no emergency potty stops. Also, "When the car stop(s), all the dogs get out.  Look where those dogs are going. To the potty! To the potty! Up they go to the (hopefully) clean potty!"
4. Inform your passengers.  Tell them ahead of time the length of your trip.  Put it into perspective.  There's a cool feature on Google maps where you can drive your trip at increased speed virtually.  It took us 7 whole minutes to reach our virtual destination.  Point out the window at interesting things you see, at stuff you know about, at places you've been or memories you have.  Road trips were times when I had my parents captive attention.  I got to know them well and was able to ask very personal questions in our speeding metal box.
5. ipod touch with free itunes episodes for extreme emergencies.  I know what I said before; this is where I relax the rule, because the thing has a battery life. When the ipod stops, so does the TV!
6. Start as early in the morning as you can stomach.  I like 4 am.  It's late enough that you still feel like you got a regular night's sleep, but early enough that you've actually got a jump on the trip.  It's all psychological.  If you start in the daylight, but don't make it to your destination till early the next day, you feel way more exhausted. Start in the dark, end in the dark.  Spread the dark time driving around. You feel like you're making way better time, and feel less stressed about the whole thing in general when you get to your end point before 12 am.
7. Also with the trip psychology: don't think in total time.  I couldn't think, "20 hrs to Tucson", but I could easily think every time I got in the car, "Can you drive 5 more hours? Of course! I can drive 5 hrs anytime!" Enjoy those sunrises and sunsets. Look around at the scenery--even in West Texas, God has made some wonderous stuff.
8. Don't stop to eat.  Eating requires sitting, so why not kill two birds with one stone and eat while driving?  I make enough PB&Js for all major meals on the trip.  I put the made sandwiches back in the bread bag and freeze the whole thing the night before. Mealtime? Pass it on back.
9. Duh. You can't do this with a baby without at least an extra adult. I soloed from IL to NC with the 3 amigos once when Button was a toddler, Boy was 3, and the lil' Chick was 4 and just stopped more often for potty and running breaks.  BUT! When you DO drive with a baby, what do you do when the baby starts crying?  You keep driving.  Don't look back. That's more dangerous than texting while driving.  Which I also don't do.

It's always better to have an extra big, sane person who can also drive in the car, but the Pransome Hince is a very important man and usually flies in to all our destinations. When he does get to drive with us, we use the same techniques; the only difference, in fact, is that I get to read to everyone and we get Daddy as an extra captive in our big, speeding, metal box.

Second Generation car seat contortionist.

**Update: I'm usually all about intrinsic rewards. (Extrinsic rewards require too much pre-planning, and aren't as effective.) We have, however, employed the "Minivan Express" method when going to Grandma's house for Christmas. After our success with the summer trip-across-Texas-New Mexico-and-AZ, we decided to do the same thing at Christmastime. I burned lots of Christmas songs, and A Christmas Carol audiobook onto CDs, filled sippy cups with tea (only handed them out 100 miles before Dallas) and wrapped 3x5 dollar store presents in Christmas paper. The night before we left, I passed out Minivan Express tickets for the kids to put under their pillows for their 4 am departure. On our way over the river and through the southern midwest, we sang yuletide songs and parsed out the cheap presents as distractions.  This was such a hit, that when it was time to travel to NC for a graduation in the spring, we did the same thing.